bless you...

i never quite understood why people say "bless you" when someone sneezes. someone long time ago told me that it came about during the great plague. when people were dropping dead left and right, they felt like they needed to do something to stop this epidemic, so they started to say ... "bless you" which really means... i hope you don't have the plague. but "i hope you don't have the plague" seemed little too long to be catchy, so they decided to just say "bless you". and what i mean by "they" is some drunk people sitting around some bar as most traditions tend to start that way.

if you ask me, it is more appropriate to say "bless you" when someone farts. because there can be some serious discomfort associated with that. i mean if you are bloated and feeling gassy, you deserve a "bless you" (except it should be said in a more sympathetic way rather than in a cheerful manner). someone who just had their nostrils tickled by some small foreign object does not deserve my "bless you". for someone who just farted, now that my friend is true blessing, a cheerful blessing.

so, i am once again on a crusade. crusade to stop saying "bless you" when someone sneezes, but to only use "bless you" when someone farts. as chance would have it, i had an occasion to use this today. i think i actually embarrassed some old lady by doing that. i guess she thought nobody heard her .... accidental gaseous eruption, but it was just so obvious. the sound resonated like string quartet in a concert hall, subtle yet powerful... anyway, perhaps i should not have been so loud when i said "bless you" because there really was no reason for me to yell it out that loud. i guess maybe i should have kind of whispered it or kind of lip-synced it. oh well.... i don't think she would die of embarrassment or anything...

(none of the characters involved in this blog was injured in any way, so rest assured, i am not an old lady killer)