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Location: huntsville, alabama, United States

i am an addict of laughter and also sadness. i guess basically i am very confused...

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

cold cold heart

her eyes are watering as she screams out in frustration. why can't you love me? are you not capable of loving? i have opened up to you and you, you, you just have this wall around you... let me in...

i wish i could tell her. i wish i could tell her that i could never love her because my heart won't let me. i keep trying. i keep hoping. maybe just maybe with time i will start feeling something. but at this point, there is no hope. there is nothing. i feel empty. i just want to be alone...

i recall a dream. a day dream of happily ever after. two people so in love with one another... the world disappears around them and nothing else matters...

i dreamt of a princess. but that was long ago... now i dream of feeling nothing, no pain, no anger...

i wish i could just tell her... you were never the one i dreamt about. you were never the one that i wanted to share my life with... and i am afraid, there may be no one that i want to share my life with...

i don't say a word. i want to hug her and tell her that it will all be okay. but then, i know my hug means nothing... so i just turn and walk out the door once again... never meaning to return... though i never say a word, i know she will be better off without me. i pray that she finds what she is looking for... i know it isn't me...

as i walk out the door of the apartment building, something makes me look up... what i see is an angel, an angel falling from the sky. wait, that is no angel, it's the girl i just left behind.

a broken neck is what ended it all. a ninety some pound girl breaks my neck as she fell from a five story building... i guess she must have jumped wanting to end her life. her life didn't end. she is fine as my neck and body broke her fall. she found a new love of her life at the hospital, a doctor... while my body sits cold in a mortuary.

11 Comments:

Blogger it's the little things said...

"....and melt your cold, cold heart....."

awesome story, Larry. and great surprise ending. spooky!

November 15, 2006 at 3:46 PM  
Blogger Granny said...

Damnit Man! You been stayin away forever and you come up with THIS?? :(

November 16, 2006 at 3:34 AM  
Blogger larrykim said...

little things, yeah, i think it's spooky too... but, you do know that i didn't actually die... right?

granny, sorry, i just don't feel funny anymore... i write where my heart is, sometimes, i don't have much control over it...

November 16, 2006 at 8:29 AM  
Blogger Granny said...

You needsa git yur funnay BACK... We's a missin it..:(

November 17, 2006 at 3:27 AM  
Blogger Cynic with Flair said...

I like this, LK. Did this just come to you or was it part of a dream?

November 18, 2006 at 7:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, it was really creative, I've missed reading your blog, I've been away so long, but your was one of the first I've looked up again! :)

-Maria (aka girlwithin)

November 19, 2006 at 9:16 AM  
Blogger larrykim said...

cynic, i didn't dream it... i just came up with it... twisted mind of larry...

maria, so glad to hear from you. i hope you are doing well. i also hope your family is well.

November 20, 2006 at 10:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ohh we are doing well, thankyou! I'm attempting to go back and read some of your blogs so I don't feel so out of the loop, but I still will ask how you are these days. I hope all is going good on your end? -Maria

November 20, 2006 at 7:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ohh we are doing well, thankyou! I'm attempting to go back and read some of your blogs so I don't feel so out of the loop, but I still will ask how you are these days. I hope all is going good on your end? -Maria

November 20, 2006 at 7:53 PM  
Blogger Granny said...

Happy Thanksgiving Larry... I hope your Bird Day is the BEST!! Smoochies..

November 22, 2006 at 3:35 AM  
Blogger Memphis Steve said...

Angels are mean.

November 24, 2006 at 2:49 PM  

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